Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

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Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  gluvzer on Wed Mar 10, 2010 11:47 am

Can you beleive it? The man, the myth, the legend turns 70 today!

Chuck Norris, born March 10, 1940.

Happy Birthday Chuck, You rule!


"Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris"

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Administratum on Wed Mar 10, 2010 11:59 am

My favorite little known fact about the legend:

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Happy birthday Chuck

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Wed Mar 10, 2010 12:37 pm

I thought those spots were reserved for people with gigantic asses?

Yeah, 70 years old.. you would never think he was that old. Most of us will probably still remember him the same way he was when he made Lone Wolf McQuade.. lithe, mean, and bearded.

Arnold, Sly,.. all the great ones are on the bad side of 60 as well. *sigh*

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  gluvzer on Wed Mar 10, 2010 12:42 pm

System Commander wrote:Most of us will probably still remember him the same way he was when he made Lone Wolf McQuade.. lithe, mean, and bearded.

But he still is all thos things!

"In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck killed that man."

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Wed Mar 10, 2010 12:46 pm

Since Corey Haim died, I'm going to go under the assumption that Chuck Norris had to sacrifice him to live another year..

Hmm. there have been alot of celebrity deaths recently.... hmmmmmmmmm

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Veyure on Wed Mar 10, 2010 2:21 pm

It's part of all the signs of apolcolypse Robyn. Lots of natural disaster followed by the death of the famous... or maybe i have it wrong... scratch

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Wed Mar 10, 2010 2:25 pm

Or Chuck Norris is like the Emperor but must feed on B list celebrities to maintain his power.. GODAMMIT.. I must warn Bruce Campbell!!! Although truthfully, Id give the edge to Bruce in a fight.. he knows all the dirty tricks.

Im onto you Chuck,..

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  ScottRadom on Wed Mar 10, 2010 2:49 pm

We have birthdays. Chuck Norris has an anniversary of awesome.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Guest on Wed Mar 10, 2010 3:28 pm

Chuck Norris doesnt sleep, he waits

Chuck norris does not have a chin under his beard, its another fist.

A blind man was walking down the street and accidently bumped into Chuck Norris. Immediately the blind man could see, but unfortunately 10 seconds later he was blind again. The last thing he saw was Chuck Norris doing a round house kick.

In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

Before being renamed, the Bibles original name was called "Chuck Norris and Friends"



On my work up training for afghanistan in California, Chuck Norris jokes are what are written in the porta-johns across the base.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Thu Mar 11, 2010 12:47 am

Im not the only one onto Chuck..

http://www.iheartchaos.com/content/corey-haim-was-sacrified-so-chuck-norris-could-live-another-year-happy-70th-birthday-chuck-n

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Paz on Thu Mar 11, 2010 9:16 am

oooh, to sooon.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  ice on Thu Mar 11, 2010 1:55 pm

Did you know that Chuck Norris invented the colour black. Infact he invented every colour in the colour spectrum, except pink tom cruise invented that.

Chuck Norris can kill two rocks with one bird.

Happy birthday Chuck

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Paz on Thu Mar 11, 2010 11:24 pm

hey Rob, did you know that Black isn't a color?




...Sick burn

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Thu Mar 11, 2010 11:39 pm

Yes I do know that it is a color, the exact same color is your evil, wiked soul!

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Paz on Fri Mar 12, 2010 1:06 am

Lol, i was talkin' to Robert. Black is a Tone, it is actually devoid of any color, like white.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Fri Mar 12, 2010 1:52 am

Ahhhhhh, damn!! I see what your saying now.. I was just trying to stretch the black thing to make a funny joke..

I thought for sure when you said Rob.. you meant me.. AND you were making fun of my color blindness.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  ScottRadom on Fri Mar 12, 2010 8:52 am

System Commander wrote:Ahhhhhh, damn!! I see what your saying now.. I was just trying to stretch the black thing to make a funny joke..

I thought for sure when you said Rob.. you meant me.. AND you were making fun of my color blindness.

Well I presonally find it VERY funny that you are colour blind! He he... can't see colours good... he he.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Cjihad on Fri Mar 12, 2010 11:02 am

Paz wrote:Lol, i was talkin' to Robert. Black is a Tone, it is actually devoid of any color, like white.

You racist.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  System Commander on Fri Mar 12, 2010 11:29 am

Hehehe.. thats funny stuff.

Anything to deflect the attention away from my handicap..

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  Guest on Fri Mar 12, 2010 4:59 pm

actually, scientifically speaking, white is the PRESENCE of ALL colours. Just look at light, if you refract white light through a prism you get the entire rainbow.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  HiveMindRuik on Fri Mar 12, 2010 5:22 pm

chuck Norris IS science Razz

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  gluvzer on Fri Mar 12, 2010 5:35 pm

HiveMindRuik wrote:chuck Norris IS science Razz

Well said..... Enough with this colour crap! This was Chuck's happy birthday thread.

Chuck Norris can roundhouse kick a rainbow.

But continue to laugh at Robyn.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

Post  ice on Fri Mar 12, 2010 7:23 pm

gluvzer wrote:
HiveMindRuik wrote:chuck Norris IS science Razz

Well said..... Enough with this colour crap! This was Chuck's happy birthday thread.

Chuck Norris can roundhouse kick a rainbow.

But continue to laugh at Robyn.

I think you mean While Chuck Norris Continues to laugh at Robyn.

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Re: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!!!

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